Why you are afraid of change
If you are like me when you think of changing anything in your life and career, at the beginning you just think about it.
You start thinking about the things which should be done, and you start thinking of what you could start doing differently in order for a certain type of situation to change.
What happens though, is that you only keep thinking about it, you actually do not really change anything.
Therefore nothing happens.
With time, the thing you know you want to change becomes a real burden, a pain. Because nothing has changed.
You are stuck.
And more stuck than you were a couple of months ago.
The pain is still there, and you go in overthinking, and get anxious about it, some days it works better and others it does not.
Until you realize that you have been thinking about wanting some change, but nothing has happened and you feel worse than before.
Well, I want you to know that this is absolutely normal.
Most part of people are afraid of change.
I was too.
Our brains are wired to preserve us from change.
Our brains do not want us to change.
Our brains do what they can to preserve us from anything that is unknown to us.
This happens because our reptilian brain, the most evolved part of our brain, the one which is in charge of our fight or flight mode, is always going to win over any other part of our brain, e.g. the neocortex, that is in charge of analytical and logical thinking and reasoning. Our fight or flight mode gets triggered, every time we have to face something new, something where we are not sure what the outcome will be, and every time we have to step out of our comfort zone. This, because the thing we need to change, is unknown to us.
Our imagination is capable of creating horrible stories and fears around something we are not familiar with. And it’s all done in order to keep you safe.
Once you know this, it becomes easier to understand why you’re suddenly coming up with all these fear thoughts. With this knowledge, you’ll then be able to notice when you have these fear thoughts, understand why they’re happening, and be able to process them so you can let them go.
Eventually you will realize that having regrets of not having done something, is one of the worst feelings we can experience. You don’t want to live with the haunting question of “What might have I achieved if I hadn’t let fear get in the way?”
This is why this week I am reaching out to you to inform you about what is REAL.
FEAR of change is most of the time only a way of preserving us from danger that our reptilian brain has automatized within us during the course of ages. It is just our thoughts, it is not reality.
I want to give you an exercise: next time you think of wanting to change something and you realize you have fear around it, start to play the “what if?” game with your brain by asking yourself:
What if I succeed?
What if it’s easy?
What if I am good enough to do it?
What if it works out?
See what comes up and have fun with it!
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